So, as I was loading up the car with kids and groceries yesterday, a woman came up to me and told me some of her story. She said that she had lost her job and moved here from Washington to live with her sister. She didn't have any money to buy food for her daughter so she asked if I could help her. Right then, Haylee needed to go to the bathroom so I decided that I could take Haylee in and then help this lady buy some groceries.
She didn't understand me so on the way in, she asked what we were doing. I told her that I could buy some things for her if she didn't mind waiting until I took Haylee to the bathroom. She said that she needed a lot of stuff and started listing off milk, bottles, a bottle cleaner/scrubber, a stroller, a few outfits for her daughter since it was her birthday, food, etc and kept repeating that she needed a lot of stuff. I said I would help but that my husband is a student and we don't have a lot of money but I was sure I could buy her a few things. (Ironically, I hadn't gone grocery shopping myself for two weeks in an effort to save some money and pay our bills.)
She waited while we used the restroom and I had a chance to think. I decided that I would let her pick out about $10 worth of stuff and pay for it. I did have cash in my wallet but I kept on thinking that I didn't want to just give that to her. When I told her my plan, she started talking about how $10 wasn't enough to get very much. She asked if I could just go to the ATM and get some money out to give to her. I told her I could only get a $20 that way and I didn't feel comfortable doing that. She acted really put out and I really just wanted to tell her to forget it but I apologized and told her that if she didn't want to do it my way, then I didn't need to help her. (I feel a little guilty because I told her that I didn't have cash)
Anyway, I pointed out some strollers in the front of the store that we could get, or said we could get a cart and get some groceries or whatever she wanted. She said a few more times how $10 wasn't going to get her very much, then she picked out a stroller. As we were walking to the register, she asked, "Can I at least get a drink too?" like a spoiled teenager. I felt embarrassed for her and super bugged but calmly replied, "Sure" and she grabbed a Red Bull.
I paid, she said thanks and left and I walked out with my kids feeling super dissatisfied. In fact, it might be the least good I have felt about helping anyone before. It might be that I didn't believe her at all, or that I lied to her about the cash, or her presumptuous manner, or being tired after my own shopping trip but I want a do over.
3 comments:
My goodness! Those are hard situations!! I know that feeling of helping someone but feeling dissatisfies. Its always because i feel like they cheated me or was so ungrateful. A red bull.... my goodness.
Wow! Nuts! You did what you could, which is more than a lot of people would do, and you were patient. Good work.
Wow- you are much better than me. I would have just said, "Sorry I don't have any cash" and walked away... especially if I had the kids in tow!
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