No Pictures!

So, I'm super lame with pictures lately! None. Sorry.

I only worked for 3 weeks and then had Christmas break. I'm so glad. I can finally get to where I feel comfortable with my prep for the class. I've been doing calculus when I can and quite enjoying it.

Christmas is just two days away. It's kind of killing me. I don't remember having so much anticipation since I was a kid. Jason says that he isn't letting me do early Christmas shopping ever again because rather than getting it done and getting good deals, I just keep buying until Christmas. It might be partially true... Buying for the girls is just fun. What I really like is I know them so well that I can get them exactly what they want and make them sooo happy. There really aren't that many people I can say that about. I love all the people I am buying for but I just search and search for ideas and I have a hard time buying them something they will even tolerate much less love... Maybe we need to re-think this buying presents thing.

Guess what else? I have what I think are hives all over my body for some reason. Yeah, I itch all over and have no idea what it is from. My body is wigging out. Merry Christmas! Every break there is some illness that finds it's way to my door. My in-laws were here last weekend when I was sick and they made me promise not to be sick for Christmas... Yeah.

Today, my sweet little Whitney decided for some strange reason that she couldn't go to the bathroom on her own. I still help her when she is sick or has diarrhea or clothes that are difficult to manage but in general, I force her to do it on her own. It's one of those things that by the time I'm on my last kid, I'll probably help them whenever they want me until they're 15 or something, but I don't have that perspective yet and worry that if I don't make her do it now, she'll grow up to be a co-dependent, unproductive member of society. We first-time parents are so dramatic. Yet, knowingly, I stubbornly fight these battles of will with my darling daughter. It happens with more things than the bathroom... Anyway, the terrible thing was my poor sister-in-law was trying to sleep after a late night and Whitney was screaming and I was yelling (I have a very difficult time maintaining my composure) and neither of us would give in.

Finally, after probably 40 minutes of heated warfare, I won. There was no joy in victory. Just shame for mis-managing something that should have been no big deal. Yeah, major mom failure. Did she learn anything? I don't think so. Did I learn anything? Not really. Could these battles happen every day for another month? Perhaps. Will I ever get better at this parenting thing? I sure hope so. How? The question every parent would like answered.

Through it all, she still hugs me and loves me. Amazing. Go Whitney! Go children! Way to survive the things your parents put you through!